Bloopers from Church Bulletins
From The Norton Buzz, August 3, 2000.
- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All
ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is
- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation
would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next
- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7PM. Please
use the back door.
- The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the
choir will sing "Break Forth Into Joy".
- A songfest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.
- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and
- The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the
Church basement Friday at 7PM. The Congregation is invited to attend
- Thursday night potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
- The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of
David, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Adams.
- Tuesday at 4PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies
giving milk will please come early.
- A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church
hall. Music will follow.
- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is
Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
- Weight Watchers will meet at 7PM at the First Presbyterian
Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
- Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.
- Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are
preparing for the girth of their first child.
- The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6PM. Steak, mashed
potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal
- The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign
slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge -- Up Yours."
- Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High."
- Don't let worry kill you; let the church help.
- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
- This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward
and lay an egg on the altar.
- The service will close with Little Drops of Water. One of the
ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join
- Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition
of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
- The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who
enjoys sinning, to join the choir.