LETTER FROM A KENTUCKIAN MOTHER TO HER SON AT THE PENNSYLVANIAN UNIVERSITY OF HIGHER EDUCATION, CLARION, PA. THE SON IS SEEKING A BETTER EDUCATION (OR A GOOD TIME).

Dear Son,

I'm writing slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your Dad read in the paper where most accidents happen within 20 miles of home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address as the last Kentucky family that lived here took the numbers with them for there next hous, so they won't have to change there address. This place has a washing machine. The first day here I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since. It only rained twice this week-- three days the first time and four days the second. The coat you wonted me to send you, your Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy in the mail with them buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket. We got another bill from the funeral home, said if we don't pay up on your Grandma, up she comes! About your father, he has a lovely new job, he has 500 people under him-- he is cutting grass at the cemetary. About your Sister, she had a new baby this morning and I haven't found out whether it's a boy or a girl, so I don't know if you are an uncle or aunt. Your Uncle Bill fell into the whiskey vat. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off playfully, so he drowned. We cremated him and he burnt for three days. Three of your friends went off the Ohio river bridge in a pickup truck, one was driving the other two was riding in the bed. The driver got out ok-- he rolled down the window, crawled out and swam to safety, the other two they drowed-- they couldn't get the tailgate down.

That's about all the news I have for now. Write more often.

Love, Mom

P.S. Was going to send you some money, but sealed the envelop before I put the money in.