HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE?

"Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if he's in love." -- Bobby, age 9

"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold... Other people care more about the food." -- Bart, age 9

"Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up." --Sarah, age 9

"See if the man has lipstick on his face." -- Sandra, age 7

"It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are --- on fire." -- Christine, age 9

TITLES OF THE LOVE BALLADS YOU CAN SING TO YOUR BELOVED

"'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'" -- Arnold, age 10

"'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.'" -- Larry, age 8

"'I Love Hamburgers, I Like You!'" -- Eddie, age 6

"'I Am in Love with You Most of the Time, but Don't Bother Me When I'm with My Friends.'" -- Bob, age 9

"'Hey, Baby, I Don't like Girls but I'm Willing to Forget You Are One!'" -- Will, age 7

"'Honey, I Got Your Curly Hair and Your Nintendo on My Mind.'" -- Sharon, age 9

WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU"

"The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day." -- Michelle, age 9

"Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad that they finally got it out and said it and now they can go eat." -- Dick, age 7

CONCERNING THE ORIGINS OF LOVE

"Cupid kissed God and that got the ball rollin'." -- Julio, age 9

"One of the Greek lady gods got a crush on one of the Greek man gods. He tried to hit her with lightning and thunderbolts, but he just couldn't get her away from him ... After a while, they became the first married gods." -- Robbie, age 8

CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE

"One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too." -- Andrew, age 6

"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell ... That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular." -- Mae, age 9

"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful." -- Manuel, age 8

ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE

"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." -- John, age 9

"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." -- Glenn, age 7

ON THE ROLE OF BEAUTY AND HANDSOMENESS IN LOVE

"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful." -- Anita C., age 8

"It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet." -- Brian, age 7

"Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time." -- Christine, age 9

REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE

"Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." -- Greg, age 8

HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE?

"Mooshy ... like puppy dogs ... except puppy dogs don't wag their tails nearly as much." -- Arnold, age 10

"When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down and they don't get up for at least an hour." -- Wendy, age 8

"All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark." -- Sherm, age 8

CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS

"They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them." -- Gavin, age 8

"They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle someday and do the holy matchimony thing." -- John, age 9

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE

"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is on television." -- Jill, age 6

"Love is foolish ... but I still might try it sometime." -- Floyd, age 9

"Yesterday I kissed a girl in a private place ... We were behind a tree." -- Carey, age 7

"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." -- Dave, age 8

"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." -- Regina, age 10

THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE A GOOD LOVER

"Sensitivity don't hurt." -- Robbie, age 8

"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." -- Ava, age 8

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

"Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores." -- Del, age 6

"Shake your hips and hope for the best." -- Camille, age 9

"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs ... and don't worry if their parents are right there." -- Manuel, age 8

"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." -- Alonzo, age 9

"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me." -- Bart, age 9